Musical Preparation Day on a Chilean Mission

Preparation day to me was

the freedom to write.

I often wrote a song either on piano or guitar -- sometimes in Spanish. I loved to send the poems home to friends with all kinds of reactions. It kept my sanity knowing that the creative spirit within me had a voice despite my serving the Lord on a mission.

One time a girl friend wrote me a letter asking if I received her letter. I wrote her back saying I didn't receive it. She told me then it didn't matter. So after my mission I had to ask her -- what was that all about? She told me she felt the poems were not about missionary work and that bothered her -- she wondered about my seriousness as a missionary. She figured if it didn't arrive then it was meant to be lost. We continued to be the best of friends.

I always found it so relaxing to find the end of the week and a bit of time to dream. Nearly 50 percent of all letters and mail did not arrive in either direction. Some of it was censored with black lines crossing out what the censor felt was inappropriate. In made me appreciate the freedom of sending mail unopened.

Freedom, I wrote, is more than the words that you give.

At the end of a tape of songs, I would send it all to another girl friend who was a fan of my songs. She saved them for me upon my return. All of them made it safely there. How amazing that in the midst of all that lost mail -- those songs survived the passage one hundred percent. And our friendship remains precious to this day. "I am just 21, feel like I've just been born. Can't say I'm 6 foot four, I'm not six foot four of anything ... I'm not six foot four of anything."

Life picked up and went on but

the impact of those dreams still inspires me today.

As the scriptures say that a small helm in a ship has a big effect -- sometimes those small but steady things we do carry on and on. My whole life has been blessed with songs I wrote reflecting the emotions of the moment.

I left my mission and began studying piano under a PhD and spent hours playing piano scales and practicing everyday. It seemed the harder I tried to play what was written, the worse I got at it. He finally told me to stop. He asked me why I would ever want to play the piano. I told him I was a songwriter and wanted to enjoy the world of music. He laughed. Let me hear one of these songs he said. So I did. Then he said, stop trying to learn music -- you already play and could play most anything by rote already.

So in 2008, a High Priest Quorum leader asked me to play the hymns in priesthood meeting. He quietly said, choose any hymn and that will be fine for us. So I did.

Every week I had something prepared.

And every chance I got I was on the piano playing through the hymn book. Suddenly I could read music. And because I can write, I can arrange it as well. Go figure!

I asked my friend Amy who plays an incredible piano what she did to play by sight so well and how long had she done it. She said, "I started when I was eight." She practiced like 30 minutes to an hour everyday and by college she had the reading part down. And she said that to learn how to read you should pick things you can read and slowly read it so that you read every note. If you choose too difficult of music, you will not be able to progress. I began to see that I was trying too hard, too quickly.

Some of those simple songs come back to over and over from my mission. "Do what the Lord tells you to do, let not the world lead you astray, open your ears -- hear out the King, open your hearts -- with happiness sing" ... in Chinese medicine it is the joy that opens the heart.

Expressions of joy surround our service to the Lord and others. "as my prayers lay me down to sleep, and I am taken to another world but I love you." Maybe this story is more of a reflection. Most of my stories have truly been reflections looking back -- and I hope that we all take a few moments and share the wealth within us for having taking a step down that road as a human being, and a step down that road in life. As a wonderful friend and fellow musician once wrote,

"life like the day is one the run."

(Thank you Skip Andrews)